like water
liquid windowpane
sunshine splash
cobble shrieks and giggles
foamy tickles on her face
slips a shawl across her shoulders
waves goodbye, laughter
coursing toward
the falls
rippled mirror
awaits the expected guest
with warmest welcome
empties herself
always making room
for more
©draft, Patricia J. Franz
October 8, 2023
WRITE OUT: DAY 1
I sat on the deck, gazed at water spilling down the small cobbled waterfall into the pond.
I challenged myself to not use the word water in this poem.
I also looked for ways to include senses (sight, touch, sound – no smell or taste) – and personification, – in this case the cobble being a young woman, the mirror being an old woman.
Seeing this now, I wonder about the underlying theme of aging and the contrasts of youth and age.
Patricia Franz is a kidlit writer and published poet. She believes children, dogs, and sourdough have a lot to teach us about life, joy, and wonder. She has raised two boys, four dogs, and holds a master’s degree in Theology with a focus on children’s spirituality. Patricia, her husband, her Bernese Mountain dog, Bonny, and her sourdough starter split their time between the Arizona desert and the Sierra Nevada mountains. 
Love the personification and thinking about water’s characteristic of delight which transcends age…
So many views of water- without the word water! Great!
And you reminded me of WriteOut, too.
Patricia, you met your challenge. The first time I read your poem a few days ago I was a little confused. Today I saw your explanation and I understand. The first time I read your poem, I knew right away that cobble shrieks and giggles /
foamy tickles on her face were about a young woman. I love your use of sensory images especially love: laughter / coursing toward / the falls and foamy tickles on her face. I enjoyed the contrasts between the younger and older women. Rippled mirror for the older woman is perfect. Always making room / for more- ooh! I also like your line breaks. After I just read your poem aloud, the first stanza with your /s/ alliteration and consonance sounds to me like waterfall! Thank you for sharing your great poem.