And Sometimes We Nap
(an excerpt)
Sometimes we run or play in the sun.
Sometimes we dance or follow some ants.
Sometimes there’s trouble if we splash in a puddle,
for that means a bath but also some cuddles . . .
and sometimes we nap.
What’s Working?
Repetition
Repetition as an anchor — sometimes this, sometimes that…and sometimes we nap — is powerful and a good structural tool.
Sight-word friendly
Child-friendly sight words for pre-readers will build confidence when reading aloud.
Rhyme
Most of the rhyming is good, if simple. Are there other options that could elevate the text?
Concept vs Story Book?
With a more intentional story arc, could this become a zany picture book starring a delightfully furry canine?
What else?
I’d love some feedback! Leave your thoughts in the comment section below.
Inspiration?
I want to write this story!
The place within me where joy bubbles forth contains a big, bouncy, beautiful dog, who faithfully follows her way-too busy humans through the week, wondering when it will be naptime!
How to capture these moments in a picture book that will delight children and their grown-ups?
Patricia Franz is a kidlit writer and published poet. She believes children, dogs, and sourdough have a lot to teach us about life, joy, and wonder. She has raised two boys, four dogs, and holds a master’s degree in Theology with a focus on children’s spirituality. Patricia, her husband, her Bernese Mountain dog, Bonny, and her sourdough starter split their time between the Arizona desert and the Sierra Nevada mountains. 